13 Signs You’re a Dog Dad
Do you constantly ask, “Who’s a good boy?!” Do you never leave home without telling your dog to have a good day? Are half of the photos in your phone of your pup? If you’re being honest, is it really closer to 75 percent? If you answered yes to all of those questions, then you, friend, might be a dog dad. Not that there’s anything wrong with this—every good pooch deserves a good papa, after all. For more signs that you’re part of this proud club, read on.
1. You brag shamelessly about your best bud.
But you don’t actually consider it bragging. The fact that your Frenchie can high-five is breaking news. After you’re done telling all your friends, you intend to alert the media, get him an agent and begin planning his book tour.
2. Your dog has three beds—but sleeps in yours.
How could you ask your little buddy to sleep on the floor? You couldn’t. The couch? Please, he’s a member of the family, not some random houseguest.
3. Dogs are always welcome at your house—other guests, well, maybe not so much.
Your personal motto? “Dogs welcome, people tolerated.” Because honestly, when was the last time a Shih Tzu drank your last beer? Have you ever heard a Labradoodle drone on about his taxes? They might nip the occasional ankle, but at least Yorkies don’t want to show you their vacation photos.
If you live by this motto and want to proudly display it, check out the Primitives By Kathy “Dogs Welcome” sign. Perfect to have on your desk or shelf.
4. Before leaving home, you make sure you have the essentials: keys, wallet, phone and, of course, your dog.
You don’t want your bud to get lonely, so you invite him out as much as possible. Everyone from the bank teller to the barista knows his name, and you’ve been requesting an outdoor table for years.
5. You wear your dog-loving heart on your sleeve—quite literally, in fact.
Advanced dog dads have dog T-shirts in their closets, and they wear them loud and proud. The way you see it, there’s no easier way to find your fellow pack members. Proudly show your dog dedication with an “I’d rather be with my dog” tee; one of many dog shirts to add to your collection.
6. Your dog has his own social media accounts.
Because why not? How else would you share his adorable snore? Or his smushy little nose? Or his big puppy dog eyes? Obviously, you consider his followers to be #blessed.
7. You tell bad dog dad jokes.
Every dad has bad jokes, and you’re no different. Yes, you like big mutts—and no, you cannot lie. (See what we did there? Of course you do, dog dad.) If this has you laughing out loud, you can tell this dad joke out loud or wear Dog is Good’s “I Like Big Mutts” T-shirt.
8. You’ve FaceTimed your dog.
And someday, when Silicon Valley finally figures out how to make dog texting a reality, you’ll be first in line for that upgrade. Now if only Cocker Spaniels had thumbs…
9. You want to pet every dog you meet.
Because while your doggo is clearly the best, you know all dogs are Very Good Boys. You know every pup on the block, never pass up an opportunity to meet a new four-legged friend, and have belly rubs on speed dial.
10. Everyone buys you dog dad gifts.
Friends and family don’t even bother asking what to get you for birthdays and holidays at this point. With your endless collection of puppy swag, you’re an expert when it comes to gifts for dog owners. You could probably open your own dog dad gift store—if you were willing to part with your bounty, which you’re clearly not.
11. And yes, you buy yourself the occasional pup present.
If more people bought gifts for dog owners—or if Golden Retrievers could get approved for credit cards—maybe you wouldn’t have to, but dog dads deserve Father’s Day presents, too. Of course, you always make sure to add plenty of dog treats and toys to the cart before checking out. Spoil yourself with an Imagine This Company “Dog Dad” magnet or a Pet Gifts USA “Dog Dad” coffee mug.
12. You have a special voice for your dog.
You know the one: goofy, high-pitched and frequently asks, “Does my good boy want a treat?!” There’s no need to be ashamed here—every dog owner worth his biscuits has a dog voice.
13. You have a hard time understanding cat people.
Not that there’s anything wrong with cats necessarily, but like many dog owners, you feel a sense of loyalty to #TeamCanine. (Which, you feel obligated to point out, is a litter box free zone. Dogs for the win!)
by Monica Weymouth